i sit down with bhante sujiva’s insight stages in my head and end up watching progress instead of mindbhante sujiva, insight stages, and the quiet habit of measuring my sits instead of being there

The figure of Bhante Sujiva and the technical stages of Vipassanā often loom over my practice, turning a moment of awareness into a secret search for achievement. The clock reads 2:03 a.m., and I am wide awake without cause—that specific state where the physical body is exhausted but the mind is busy calculating. The fan’s on low, clicking eve

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